Today was one of those days when I wonder if I’m out to get me.
First I dreamed about a fight. I’m not sure why I was having it, but definitely it was something heroic and Matrix-like in its cool. There were (probably) spinning kicks and majestic dodges against my huge male foe who was almost certainly evil. And then I punched him, and woke just as my fist hit the wall next to my bed. It hurt, but apparently even majestic fights are quite puny when they leave the dream world, so no damage. A definite sense of Oh you fucking idiot, though.
Then I went to work, and I had to cut back some large Euphorbia. Euphorbia can be nasty because it has poisonous sap that oozes out all over you when you cut it, but I’m lucky and don’t react to it, it’s just sticky and annoying.Ā What I was more bothered about was the insects living in the bed that didn’t like my invasion of their space. They started biting me, not unreasonably. But I noticed that they bit less the more sap I got on me. Aha! I thought. Nature’s insect repellent. Because of course that is why Euphorbia has toxic sap – to keep away biting insects. So I smeared some on my arms and legs and the insects left me alone. I felt so clever.
Then in the afternoon I got quite dusty and wiped my arm over my face, then carried on chopping – Mahonia this time. My eye started to sting, but I assumed it was the dust and blinked it away. But the pain wouldn’t go and was getting quite nasty. I staggered out of the bed and poured some water on my eye. A friendly builder working nearby asked I was ok. ‘I think so, I just got something in my eye,’ I said. ‘It’s not Euphorbia sap is it? Because that’s really dangerous if you get it in your eyes.’
And I realised that of course it fucking was, so I went back to base and spent the next ten minutes trying to wash the toxic sap out of my damn eye. And for anyone following this blog, yes it was the same eye that landed me in Urgent Care a few weeks ago.
That afternoon I was working in the same bed, trying to not be a self-sabotaging fool, and I looked up and saw this face looking down at me from a nearby statue. Pitying, exasperated, unimpressed, I have a feeling this statue has seen many idiots before.
But more importantly, is she holding a kitten?
I see a kitten. Also your dream – may be the start of your next book?
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Glad you see the kitten too! And that’s a great idea š
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I feel like everybody else, the dream fight could be the start of another book… You should wear gloves and or safety glasses when messing around with Euphorbia…maybe. You know what’s best, but that sounds like some nasty stuff to get on you. Not sure in the photo if she has a cat, but her face seems to say “Oh you poor poor dear!”
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Aw, I’m glad she’s thinking something kind. You are probably right about the PPE, we gardeners tend to avoid it until someone gets hurt – we are better than builders though!
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PPE wouldn’t have helped in this case, because you touched your face subconsciously. Mother nature is a tough old coot. Be safe. š
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Thank you, you too! š
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Never a dull moment with you…
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That is a nice way of putting it š
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Still loving the book!
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Woohoo! š
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Bloody Nora – hope you’re eyes are OK – what a crock. Stay safe, inkbiotic x
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They’re fine now, thank you! x
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Oh dear – ‘your’ not ‘you’re’ – hate it when people get that wrong and then I get to be one of them. Tuh!
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It happens to the best of us!
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Owl? With a broken leg? Who’s the statue of, Athena? The thick plottens…
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Ah, finding out who the statue is would be a great way of working out what she’s holding. I shall investigate…
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And you know of course I hope your eye is better, I wasn’t being insensitive but I could see from previous comments you were on the mend — keep safe and take care.
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No insensitivity detected! But thank you, I tend to heal up quickly, which is lucky since I head so often into minor disaster š
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The world does not stand a chance against you. Quite right too. It is a better place with you in it. If I may offer just one word of advice re. wall punching. Always go for stud walls – they are much more forgiving. Just keep on doing what you do – although I can’t help but worry what’s next for your eye.
PS Defo a kitten š
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I’m glad you’re seeing the kitten too š A friend, somewhat sarcastically, suggested padded walls. A little rude, I think.
And big thank you for saying the world is better for me being in it, that’s the aim, I reckon. And you too, of course. The world needs lots of good, sunshine people right now, to out number the bad.
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I’m not certain about ‘sunshine people’ in my case. More like low cloud with the threat of encroaching sea-fret if I’m honest, but I’ll keep on trying š
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š
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I think your eyes saw too much fighting in the dream. They needed a thorough cleansing. I hope your eye is better now. Poor one has just walked out of Emergency care. You seem to be on self-destruct mode. No wonder the statue was concerned about her/his kitten learning bad things from you.
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I try not to be a bad influence for kittens, but I can understand the concern.
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The statue holds three people. One of them has grapes and could be Dionysus, the God of harvest and wine-making. The lady (I assume she is a lady) looking down at you with worry could be Goddess Libertas (the Goddess of Liberty), or Diana (the Goddess of Domesticated animals, hunt and virgins). She certainly seemed worried about your influence on the cat, so probably Diana.
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Aha! I think I have an answer for this question, I just need to get it together and write a blog! I like the idea of gods looking down at me though, especially if they have cats š
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